


When the War is Over

by heyheylove



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Doc/Donut is on the side, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-21
Updated: 2016-04-21
Packaged: 2018-06-03 13:02:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,550
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6611578
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heyheylove/pseuds/heyheylove
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Simmons didn't tell him, he didn't tell anyone. How could he? Love has no place when fighting a war and Simmons knew that.</p>
            </blockquote>





	When the War is Over

The war is over. They won, but there was no parade in their honor. No cheers or pats on the back. There was just goodbyes filled with empty promises of ‘see you soon’ and ‘we'll get together sometime.’ 

Simmons didn't tell him, he didn't tell anyone. How could he? Love has no place when fighting a war and Simmons knew that. He'd grown to accept it. He promised himself he'd tell Grif when the war was over, another broken promise to add to the list. Grif went back to Hawaii with Sister, Sarge went out to fight another war, Donut went back to Iowa along with Doc, and Simmons was left helplessly alone and filled with what if’s.

Simmons went back home, back to his mother and father. Simmons had won a war and his father still found something to be mad at, and his mother asked about his cyborg parts and all of his scars. Simmons didn't want to think of how much of himself he had given up in the war- how much of himself he had given up to Grif. He wondered if Grif thinks about him too, when he looks at his scars and the parts of him that aren't him. 

Simmons was never one to deal with his feelings, he repressed everything and hoped that it would go away. He'd repressed this for years, but the love he felt only grew stronger with the bright smiles and lighthearted laughs Grif would give him. 

\---

Three months after being back Simmons got a letter in the mail. It was an invitation, to a wedding for Doc and Donut, not surprising. Simmons was happy for them, but he wasn't sure if he was going to go. The invitation had a number on it, so people could rsvp, so he called it. Donut picked up and Simmons realized how much he had missed him. 

“Oh, hey Simmons!” Donut was as cheery as ever, he sounded happier too.

“Hey Donut.” Simmons tried to sound more excited to match Donuts enthusiasm. “Congrats on the engagement.”

“Thank you! Are you calling to rsvp?” Donut questioned. He had doubt in his voice, like he knew that Simmons was going to lie and say he can't make it. When Simmons didn't answer he continued talking. “Because Grif did and I was wondering if it was okay if I sat the two of you next to each other.” his voice was fast but hesitant, he knew Grif was a subject that Simmons wanted to avoid. 

Even though Simmons never told him, Donut had figured it out on his own. They never talked about it but the nights when he found Simmons crying softly outside the base, he knew it was because of Grif, because it hurt him to ignore his feelings. Donut wouldn't say a word to him on those nights, just sit next to him and hug him while he cried. 

“Grifs coming?” Simmons asked softly. He could see Grif again. Keep the promise he made to himself.

“Yeah, and Sarge too. I think all of the blues are coming too! Oh, Simmons it'll be like a family reunion!” Donuts voice got high pitched and Simmons could hear him jumping. Simmons laughed, a real laugh, a laugh that he hadn't done in a while. 

“Yeah, Donut. Just like a family reunion. I'll be there.” Simmons said, Donut squealed. 

“It's going to be so much fun!” Donut yelled. They talked for a while, catching up on everything that's happened in the three months that they've been apart. Donut did a lot, while Simmons had very little to say. He got a job, his own place, not much more than that. He tried to go on a few dates, they didn't work out well. People seemed freaked out by his cyborg parts, but he has gotten used to the stares- needless to say he doesn't go out much. 

\--- 

The wedding venue was beautiful, only the best for Doc and Donut. The banner above the door said ‘Franklin & Frank: Wedding of the Year’ in a fancy font. Simmons smiled, remembering how Donut would talk about getting a banner like that back when Donut and Doc started dating. Simmons was happy that it worked out for him, he deserves to be happy.

Simmons paid the cab driver and started up the stairs toward the doors. He took a cab, if he got rejected alcohol would be his best friend for the night, and he didn't want to drive home drunk.

Inside the venue house was beautiful, most of the house was blocked off, only meant for people to walk through to get to the back yard where the ceremony was being held. He followed the signs leading out the back door, made his way to the tent that was out there. It was a nice day, perfect for a wedding. The tent seemed crowded, everyone at the opening to sign in and get their table number.

There was a dance floor in the middle of the tent, surrounded by pink and purple numbered tables. The dance floor had a table in the middle of it with small foods to hold people over before the big meal. He didn't look for Grif, even though he knew that he would be over there.

Simmons signed in, got his table number, and found his seat. 

“Simmons.” A gruff and demanding voice came from behind him. Sarge. Simmons turned around and took Sarge hand and shook it.

“Sir.” Simmons replied back, smiling. He missed Sarge.

“ How have you been private?” Sarge hadn't changed, same haircut, same ‘I'm in charge’ military man voice. 

“Good, Sir.” Simmons stood straight, tried to keep his voice from cracking. “And you, Sir?”

“Mighty fine, Simmons.” He answered. Simmons nodded, Sarge was always more comfortable fighting wars, like he was made for it. Simmons was surprised he made it to the wedding.

“I heard that you got a new team. How's that going.” Small talk is the only thing Simmons could think of, just like at a family reunion. Donut was right. 

“Not as good as you guys, but they'll get the job done.” Sarge smiled, he looked over Simmons shoulder and his smile dropped.

“Simmons!” The voice was unmistakable, high pitched and smooth at the same time. “You have got to try their finger sandwiched, it's like heaven in my mouth.” Simmons didn't want to turn around, but it'd be rude if he didn't. When he did, he saw Grif put one of the tiny sandwiches in his mouth, tilt his head back, close his eyes and moan.

He was wearing a suit, just like everyone else, and his tie was orange. Simmons noticed that everyone went with their armour color for their tie, so had Simmons. Seeing Grif again made him feel warm and nervous, his heart was beating fast and everything seemed like it was in slow motion. He felt himself fall back into their old banter, what he had gotten used to, what he loved.

“Of course you'd like it, fat ass. You like anything you can eat.” Simmons tried not to laugh, and failed. 

“Shut up, you were probably over here kissing Sarge ass before I came over.” Grif spoke with a full mouth. Sarge huffed.

“Atleast Simmons here has some respect for his supervisor.” Sarge barked out. 

“Superior my ass, you aren't in charge of me anymore.” Grif scuffed back at him Simmons felt his heart drop when Grif looked at him a smiled.

“If I had my shotgun I would shoot you, private.” Sarge said through his teeth and went over to the bar. Simmons was alone with Grif now, they looked at each other for a while before either one of them spoke. Simmons wanted to tell him so much, how he missed him, thought about him everyday, stopped himself from calling or texting. He wanted to tell him that he loved him, that he's always loved him. But instead he asked him how he's been. Talked about the flight here, how it is to be back home. Small talk. Like a family reunion. Donut was right. 

\--- 

They sat next to each other during the ceremony. Doc stood under the white arch, smiling wide and bright. His tuxedo was black and he wore a purple bow tie. They were outside of the tent, just to the right, and everyone was watching the back door of the house as to very noticeable bridal music started to play. Donuts groomsmen walked out, hand in hand with Docs groomsmen. Then Donut walked out. He was wearing an all white tuxedo and a pink bow tie. He looked amazing. 

When Donut walked out Grif looked at Simmons. He smiled and hit Simmons on the arm, he looked like he was about to cry. Simmons felt the same way, it was like watching their brother get married. After spending so long hearing Donut talk about it, it's hard to believe that it's actually happening.  
Their vows were sweet, they both started crying, so did Simmons. Grif noticed, and after the ceremony was done he made fun of him for it. Their usual banter was back, Simmons felt relaxed for the first time in months.

\--- 

After the dinner and cake cutting the dance floor opened up. Slowly people started to drift to it and dance to the upbeat songs that were playing, most of them tipsy and not caring. Simmons hasn't had a drink yet, he noticed that Grif hasn't either. 

“Do you wanna dance?” Grif yelled so Simmons could hear him over the music. It was a simple question, didn't mean anything other than what was said, but Simmons still felt his heart beat faster and hesitated before nodding. If he didn't say yes then there would be no good time to tell Grif what he felt. He has to say it when they are crowded, so if things go bad he won't make a scene.

As they stepped on the dance floor a slow song started to play, many people walked off, Simmons when to leave too, but Grif grabbed his wrist. Light enough that Simmons could still walk off if he wanted to, but just tight enough that it made him want to stay. His goofy smile, bright eyes, dark skin with patches of Simmons freckled white skin, every part of him was perfect. Every part of him reminded Simmons why he fell in love with him, why he stayed in love with him.

“C’mon, Simmons. It'll be fun.” it sounded sarcastic, it probably was, but Simmons was too far gone; Too caught up in his eyes and his smile and the way his lips moved when he talked, to even notice if it was sarcastic. He only nodded and followed Grif the rest of the way to the middle of the dance floor, not trusting himself with words. Grif went on his tippy toes so he could reach up and wrap his arms around Simmons neck. Simmons placed his hands on Grifs hips, freaking out on the inside. His heart was beating so fast he was afraid that Grif could hear it. He probably could because he rested his head on Simmons chest. Simmons wasn't ready for this, he didn't know what this meant.

“I missed you, Simmons.” Grifs voice was soft, serious. If Grif couldn't hear his heart before he definitely could now, it was beating so hard that Simmons thought it was going to break out of his chest.

Simmons didn't say anything for a while, his mind was running too fast for him to think about saying anything. It wasn't until Grif lifted his head and looked him in the eyes that he spoke. He didn't mean to say it he couldn't stop himself from letting the words tumble out of his mouth.

“I love you.” He whispered. He almost thought that Grif didn't hear him, but after a moment he smiled, soft and reassuring.

“Come back with me.” Grif said, words fast and rushed, like he wanted to say it before he stopped himself. Simmons tilted his head as he thought.

“To your hotel?” his voice was hesitant. He didn't expect this to go so well. He expected to be yelled at, drink thrown in his face, shit faced by the end of the night stumbling back to his hotel. 

“No, well, yes, but I mean to Hawaii. Come back with me to Hawaii.” Grifs voice faded at the last part, like he was losing his confidence. Simmons wanted to say yes. Scream yes from the damn rooftops, it's what he wanted. To be with Grif, to live with him. But he knows it's not realistic. He can't just drop his life and move to Hawaii for a relationship that he can't even be sure will last. His heart hurts as the realization comes on him, that he has to be logical, that he has to tell Grif to do the same. Just like always.

“Grif…” Simmons started, taking his hands off his hips and stepping back a bit. “I can't just drop everything and move to Hawaii. I have a life now, a job, an apartment. I can't just leave.” He spoke sternly, like he was trying to convince himself, because he was.

Grif smiled sadly and looked down. “I know, Simmons.” He looked back up, eyes starting to water and turn red. “But I had to try.” He handed Simmons a piece of paper before he walked away, leaving Simmons in the middle of the dance floor alone. Simmons shoved the paper in his pocket, he didn't want to look at it yet. Not until he gets home. He said what he came here to say, now he can get over him, but if he looks at the paper now he knows he'll go chase after him. They both need to move on, enjoy their own lives.

Simmons decided not to drink, he already felt shitty and he didn't want to make it worse. He said his goodbyes to the reds and blues, save for Grif who was nowhere to be seen. He when back to his hotel, got in his car, and drove home.

\--- 

When he was done unpacking he layed in his bed holding the paper that Grif gave him. He had unfolded and refolded it so many time, trying to will himself to read it, but he couldn't. He didn't want to see what it was, he knew that it would only make his heart hurt more.

He opened it. It was an address. Under the address in sloppy handwriting, Grifs, was ‘Come over some time nerd.’ Simmons laid back. He wanted to cry, he wanted to yell, but he didn't. Instead he took a shower, took some time to think.

The next day he cancelled his lease on his apartment, quit his job, packed his belongings and bought the first one-way ticket to Honolulu, Hawaii that he could get, and he looked at the piece of paper as be boarded the plane. He showed up at Grif door step at 1am with all of his luggage, Grif answered the door with a smile. 

Simmons knew that it was illogical, dumb and irrational, but he was never rational when it came to Grif.

**Author's Note:**

> Nobody asked for this, I'm sorry. You can show me some love on tumblr (chaoticrooster) if that's your thing, or leave a comment because feedback gives me life. Thank you for reading and have a lovely day/night or whatever time it is for you! <3
> 
> P.S. I love you


End file.
